Rediscovery

It's amazing how, when we haven't done something for a while, our bodies so accurately remind us. You know, like when you go for a run after a 6 month hiatus, or lift weights for the first time in a while. We remember quite clearly how it used to feel - and it didn't hurt quite like this!

The phenomenon I'm referring to is called cognitive dissonance, when what we remember doesn't match up with reality. We remember our level of skill, aptitude and capability at an earlier time, and (foolishly) believe that we still have that, despite the passage of time. Trust me, muscle memory only goes so far. Go ahead, try to do a cartwheel - I dare you. Something as simple as a cartwheel, a feat we could reel off in multiple successions as 10 year olds, becomes quite a daunting task as a 25 or (ahem) 33 year old. Hand stands? Climbing trees? Forget it!

The whole concept of returning to an activity I was formally adept at becomes for me a process of rediscovery. How does this work for me now? Can I return to my former state, or is the goal really to define a new state? I think this is the case, as I try to fit my passion for running, reading, work, friends and family into the constructs of the new space and time that I am in.

Rediscovering who I am, what I'm all about, and how to balance all that is important to me is an interesting process, now that I finally feel like I have the capacity to engage in those things. Of course, I am mere hours into a new job, a new career. My sense, my hope and my intention is that this new career will contribute to my life and my interests, rather than take from it.

Time will tell.